Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
chicago_animal

Relationship Status?

101 posts in this topic

I'm sad to report that my wife and I are going to be losing our pregnancy. The development stopped around 4-5  weeks (over a month ago), so it's an nonviable pregnancy. It's been... an incredibly hard, sad, and frustrating week. 

I knew my wife was strong, but, damnit if she isn't a champion I don't know who is. I severely underestimated her strength for this type of thing. Now we're awaiting a miscarriage which is coming in the next day or two. :( This fear has come true,  which is why we hadn't told a lot of people we were pregnant yet. 

It sucks so much. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Koldes said:

I'm sad to report that my wife and I are going to be losing our pregnancy. The development stopped around 4-5  weeks (over a month ago), so it's an nonviable pregnancy. It's been... an incredibly hard, sad, and frustrating week. 

I knew my wife was strong, but, damnit if she isn't a champion I don't know who is. I severely underestimated her strength for this type of thing. Now we're awaiting a miscarriage which is coming in the next day or two. :( This fear has come true,  which is why we hadn't told a lot of people we were pregnant yet. 

It sucks so much. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. 

I'm sorry to hear that Koldes. I can't even imagine what you both must be feeling right now.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 hours ago, Koldes said:

I'm sad to report that my wife and I are going to be losing our pregnancy. The development stopped around 4-5  weeks (over a month ago), so it's an nonviable pregnancy. It's been... an incredibly hard, sad, and frustrating week. 

I knew my wife was strong, but, damnit if she isn't a champion I don't know who is. I severely underestimated her strength for this type of thing. Now we're awaiting a miscarriage which is coming in the next day or two. :( This fear has come true,  which is why we hadn't told a lot of people we were pregnant yet. 

It sucks so much. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. 

I'm so sorry to hear the news, man. My wife had a miscarriage too in her first pregnancy about 11-12 weeks into it. It's something that she says she'll never forget as it's so emotional, but the second time worked out as have our son now. It will work out for you guys too. Just try to have faith and think positive. Miscarriages are very common and especially in the first pregnancy. I think it's over 25%. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Oh man. So sorry for you and your wife today Koldes. Remember if you ever need to shout into the void about any of this stuff we're right here for ya.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
7 hours ago, Koldes said:

I'm sad to report that my wife and I are going to be losing our pregnancy. The development stopped around 4-5  weeks (over a month ago), so it's an nonviable pregnancy. It's been... an incredibly hard, sad, and frustrating week. 

I knew my wife was strong, but, damnit if she isn't a champion I don't know who is. I severely underestimated her strength for this type of thing. Now we're awaiting a miscarriage which is coming in the next day or two. :( This fear has come true,  which is why we hadn't told a lot of people we were pregnant yet. 

It sucks so much. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. 

I am so sorry to read this. I know the both of you will be amazing parents when the time is right. 

 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 hours ago, Koldes said:

I'm sad to report that my wife and I are going to be losing our pregnancy. The development stopped around 4-5  weeks (over a month ago), so it's an nonviable pregnancy. It's been... an incredibly hard, sad, and frustrating week. 

I knew my wife was strong, but, damnit if she isn't a champion I don't know who is. I severely underestimated her strength for this type of thing. Now we're awaiting a miscarriage which is coming in the next day or two. :( This fear has come true,  which is why we hadn't told a lot of people we were pregnant yet. 

It sucks so much. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. 

Sorry to hear this man, you were so excited. Your joy was short but it's a special type of joy many won't ever experience, but I'm sure you will experience it again when your ready to start trying again. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Thanks everybody, means a lot.

My wife and I didn't tell many family and friends out of fear of this very thing, so there's a lot more of you guys here that know, than irl. It feels good to not go through it completely alone. A few sympathetic words does seem to make a difference. 

I do have a positive story, though. After this past week of hell, I assumed my wife would want to wait a while before we try again (justifiably so). But I asked her last night, and she said "as soon as possible." I underestimated her strength by a lot. 

Thanks again for the kind words! 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Koldes, I'm so sorry, my friend.  My brother just went through that last year. He's now about to have his first child in the coming month. I know nothing anyone says makes that pain go away, but I really am hurting for you and your wife, my dude.


as far as @Mike and anyone else posting, I hate that I don't come around here more than I do. I work 50+ hours now. With it being FF season, my free time is spent focusing on draftkings and fantasy football. That said, there's not much "Free time."  Most of my up-votes @Ruiner speaks of happen when I'm at work on a phone call leaving a voicemail and I'm just browsing the board. I'm always like "man, I need to retort to Mike's dumb comment here" or shit like that, but then life happens.  I can say, I don't consider this place any less important than it was when it was easier to check all the time.  I'm going to make it a commitment to be around more as I have grown to value the e-friendships (and some, real life friendships) I've made with some of you and I don't want some of y'all to just suddenly dip out thinking I or anyone else cared less.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Look who it is!

I guess I'll give an answer to this topic that's different from my cynical snarky one on the first page: nothing really ever came up since the last time this was discussed, aside from some Tinder matches that I didn't message. I don't remember how worried I was about it when I was in Seattle for some reason (or much of what I thought about anything, for that matter) but since I left, like I posted about in the other thread, I've gotten a bit of focus on what I want to do with my life and am more concerned with figuring that out, which is a good feeling. Like the stretch near the ending of 500 Days of Summer with Tom overcoming his depression by focusing on architecture. I need to watch that movie again.

So yeah, my attitude right now towards relationship prospects is as passive as it's always been, but without the depression and self-destruction. It helps that I'm in a place that's comparatively barren in prospective mates to Seattle, and I'm trying to move across the country ASAP so any relationship with a hypothetical chance encounter I make here wouldn't have much time to go anywhere. The depression creeps up every now and again when I hear about my friend and his wife in California socializing with their new married friends, but thankfully, since my time in Washington, I know the remedy for that. :)

I really wish I could meet a more-attractive female clone of me. She'd have different but adjacent musical taste--she'd probably feel about The Cure and Deftones how I feel about NIN and Queen of the Stone Age--play lots of video games, have good enough taste in TV but not be an expert so I could show her all of my favorite shows and she'd like them. She, on the other hand, would be a movie buff so there'd be give-and-take there. She wouldn't be a wrestling fan but she'd love a sport (preferably baseball or hockey, but I'd accept football) and we'd grow to enjoy and appreciate other's sporting-type hobby with one another. She'd hate it here as much as I do and we could move to Seattle together and form a band.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I consider myself unmatchable so I haven't been in a ton of relationships but I imagine one of the worst parts of one is the TV aspect. I just imagine every couple sits there together watching terrible reality shows or something on CBS on the DVR. It must be dreadful sitting there forced to watch a show that someone else likes but you don't care about.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
19 minutes ago, Mike said:

I consider myself unmatchable so I haven't been in a ton of relationships but I imagine one of the worst parts of one is the TV aspect. I just imagine every couple sits there together watching terrible reality shows or something on CBS on the DVR. It must be dreadful sitting there forced to watch a show that someone else likes but you don't care about.

I girl I really like and hope to date loves reality shows, including the Kardashians. I told her i Iike her enough that I would watch with her. I usually only drink on the weekends but I might need to drink more often if I gotta watch that crap. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
6 hours ago, Ruiner said:

Look who it is!

I guess I'll give an answer to this topic that's different from my cynical snarky one on the first page: nothing really ever came up since the last time this was discussed, aside from some Tinder matches that I didn't message. I don't remember how worried I was about it when I was in Seattle for some reason (or much of what I thought about anything, for that matter) but since I left, like I posted about in the other thread, I've gotten a bit of focus on what I want to do with my life and am more concerned with figuring that out, which is a good feeling. Like the stretch near the ending of 500 Days of Summer with Tom overcoming his depression by focusing on architecture. I need to watch that movie again.

So yeah, my attitude right now towards relationship prospects is as passive as it's always been, but without the depression and self-destruction. It helps that I'm in a place that's comparatively barren in prospective mates to Seattle, and I'm trying to move across the country ASAP so any relationship with a hypothetical chance encounter I make here wouldn't have much time to go anywhere. The depression creeps up every now and again when I hear about my friend and his wife in California socializing with their new married friends, but thankfully, since my time in Washington, I know the remedy for that. :)

I really wish I could meet a more-attractive female clone of me. She'd have different but adjacent musical taste--she'd probably feel about The Cure and Deftones how I feel about NIN and Queen of the Stone Age--play lots of video games, have good enough taste in TV but not be an expert so I could show her all of my favorite shows and she'd like them. She, on the other hand, would be a movie buff so there'd be give-and-take there. She wouldn't be a wrestling fan but she'd love a sport (preferably baseball or hockey, but I'd accept football) and we'd grow to enjoy and appreciate other's sporting-type hobby with one another. She'd hate it here as much as I do and we could move to Seattle together and form a band.

Have you tried this site yet? I believe it matches based on musical taste. https://tastebuds.fm/

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 9/30/2016 at 5:25 PM, Koldes said:

I'm sad to report that my wife and I are going to be losing our pregnancy. The development stopped around 4-5  weeks (over a month ago), so it's an nonviable pregnancy. It's been... an incredibly hard, sad, and frustrating week. 

I knew my wife was strong, but, damnit if she isn't a champion I don't know who is. I severely underestimated her strength for this type of thing. Now we're awaiting a miscarriage which is coming in the next day or two. :( This fear has come true,  which is why we hadn't told a lot of people we were pregnant yet. 

It sucks so much. I wouldn't wish this upon my worst enemy. 

Sorry to hear. Best wishes getting through it. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 10/1/2016 at 8:47 PM, Nixon said:

@Koldes, I'm so sorry, my friend.  My brother just went through that last year. He's now about to have his first child in the coming month. I know nothing anyone says makes that pain go away, but I really am hurting for you and your wife, my dude.

Thanks man. I really appreciate it. If there's one thing that I've been reminded of through this experience is just how far other people's empathy really can go and how many good people are out there. It's easy to let the shit of the world get you down but seeing how many people really care has re-enforced my belief in how good the world is. And is a good reason why I want to bring a mini-me into the world one day. And we will! 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
On 10/2/2016 at 2:51 AM, revlongoo said:

Have you tried this site yet? I believe it matches based on musical taste. https://tastebuds.fm/

Oh yeah and I tried that site a loooooong time ago. I think I still have a profile. It was pretty useless then though--probably a combination of geography and what I have to imagine is a relatively small userbase.

So I decided to go back and import my Last.fm data and noW ALL OF MY FUCKING SCROBBLES ARE GONE WHAT THE FUCK

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

My girlfriend and I broke up about two months ago. We were together for about a year but we had pretty much been a thing off and on through out high school and college so it seemed more like 10 years. I took it pretty hard for awhile and still kind of am in a way. We are in good terms and what not but it sure has been hard to put myself back out there and put effort into someone new.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.